I quit once for 7 years and didn't know about it til my phone finally rang. https://t.co/18y7bjVEXC— Ron Perlman (@perlmutations) June 20, 2017

I'm finally figuring out who inspires me and who drains me...— Sue Tsai (@SueTsai) June 20, 2017

Amazon buying Whole Foods is sign of the end of times https://t.co/S4gRgnWkDI— The Outline (@outline) June 21, 2017

If something else doesn't kill us first.

I guess I can add like a $500 Patreon tier that will get you unblocked on Twitter— sarah jeong (@sarahjeong) June 21, 2017

Do men like being kicked in the sack? Women in new survey given after being shown this headline say yes. pic.twitter.com/pdKh5EWd2U— The Volatile Mermaid (@OhNoSheTwitnt) June 20, 2017

Poo Monday - New Odor— ©𝑱𝑶𝒀𝑪𝑬 (@JEAUYCE) June 21, 2017

“There's a reason why you see the same thing everywhere right after learning about it. 🤔 via @letmeglglthat : https://t.co/ggLtPOeTKb https://t.co/Hk6nUZvrrO”

it's nice to be appreciated pic.twitter.com/tY3kJrxpXl— andrew webster (@A_Webster) June 20, 2017

it's nice to be appreciated pic.twitter.com/tY3kJrxpXl— andrew webster (@A_Webster) June 20, 2017

I think I may stop smoking at night for the sole reason that it doesn't allow me to tap into my rem cycle. I really hate not dreaming.— 𝖑𝖆𝖚𝖗𝖎𝖘𝖘𝖆 (@nuuuuuugz) June 20, 2017

your car is so disappointed in you dave— Virgy Virgil (@virgyvirgil) June 20, 2017

girl at Olive Garden:me: pic.twitter.com/5TgVOOwmuQ— Lilly~of~Ｅｘｔ★ｃｙ (@GunstarHeroine) June 20, 2017

Loving women isn't the same as wanting to have sex with them my man— Tony نعیم (@StrengthBuild) June 20, 2017

girl at Olive Garden:me: pic.twitter.com/5TgVOOwmuQ— Lilly~of~Ｅｘｔ★ｃｙ (@GunstarHeroine) June 20, 2017

Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power Tweets absolutely.— Dave Pell (@davepell) June 20, 2017